I do a lot of crazy stuff. Okay maybe I’ve gotten better at fucking up. Wait, that doesn’t make much sense. Doesn’t it mean that I am fucking up more? Like, a better fuck upper or fucker up? My head’s spinning!!!
So I have gone and posted that I am taking a break from Instagram (MY BELOVED) {insert theatrics and shit here} and have left my followers, all 4 of them. LOL. I kid. I have some really loyal people on there. People who like even the most random of posts. And I post EVERYDAY. Okay maybe not so much over the weekend because I’m either sleeping, snogging or just not in the mood. I think that’s when I live. LOL.
But now I announced this which adds even more pressure coz I like, “legit” (I’m tryna sound hip) cannot go back on my word. So I have to stick to it. I have to not be on there. Posting shit. And liking shit. Which I do a lot. I like liking. And it never means more than that to me. It means I like your stuff. To ME it is “hey, I saw this post, I am acknowledging it and here is proof” And when I really really really love it, I will leave a comment. I’m going to miss that. I am going to miss my little community. As warped and deranged as that sounds. I am going to miss that little life. With everyone that I know is checking up/ in on me instead of picking up the phone and calling me. With everyone that never likes or comments OR EVEN FOLLOW (yes, that is really a thing and I have decided to call them ghost followers. I said this first OKAY!!!!) but can give me a rundown on my daily posts LOL!
My page was started from scratch.With minimal migration from my Facebook days and failed twitter life LOL!!!!! I promise, I had like 200+ twitter followers. It was ridiculous. Maybe one day I’ll try again. I hated talking to myself publicly – okay not so much when I was drunk and watching soppy films. hahahahah!!!
Insta has made it to 700+ and that’s pretty cool. I know I lost all the followers I had gained from my lingerie shoot. LOL! They found out that there is actually more depth to me. And that I like my clothes on. 😛
I really appreciate the few friends I have made and met on Instagram. The laughs and appreciation I received for my posts. The outlet it has been. Social media is a great platform. It is powerful and influential. It can open up a whole new world. Which it has for a loner such as myself.
I’d like my pages everywhere to leave a mark. To have an impact. On someone. If not everyone. Talk about ambition. I am a marketing student. It’s time I focused, I might learn a thing or two on promoting myself and my beliefs. LOL – thank you, thank you. That was my acceptance speech for the everything award.
I’m really going to miss Instagram. I’m going to be such a pest to my people. My poor poor lover!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😦
The truth is, I have lived a pretty open life. Open in the sense that I know a lot of people – yes, there was a time I used to love people a lot – and in the short space of time they’ve known me, they have experienced a lot of shit go down in my life. Stuff I would rather they didn’t see or know about me. I’ve been honest and very forthcoming about my struggles. And the world just wasn’t ready for that. It’s amazing how it is now only that people are “woke” to the okayness of not being okay. How everyone wants to share their deepest and darkest stories without being judged because it is “okay” and “hip” to do so. LOL this is already another post. And I digress!
I have been so caught up with being okay and making sure that it is obvious that the second I find myself having a moment of letting myself feel whatever is happening, I feel the need to snap out of it lest I be seen as that same old kid who “loves being sad” and being forced to unlearn everything I am and dishonouring my true-self for the sake of likes (in this case, being deemed cool). The reality is, I don’t want to be a robot. I am a feeler. And cannot apologize for that. I will not.
I am at a really good place.Probably the best I have known since my early teens. I am happy. I am free. I am light. I am in love. I am making love. I am getting the degree I’ve wanted for the longest time. And I do not want to cheapen the experience by trying to find photos that represent it. I have the words. But InstaGlam is not ready for this. So I shall type it all up here.
And now to finish this post off. With another commitment. hehehehehe… I am on a roll.
4 Blogs a week! #LETSGO
This is post #1
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